RESOURCES
 
 

The Unique Journey of Grief

Reflections of a Hospital Chaplain

¨ No one likes to talk about death. Everyone needs to.
¨ Tears and laughter, sorrow and joy: God’s reminders of the richness of love.
¨ Dealing with grief can bring out the worst—and the best— in families.
¨ The brutal reality of death is salved by shared stories of earlier days.
¨ Grieving is a process, one that takes time. And then some more time.
¨ The more significant the relationship, the deeper the wound, the longer the healing.
¨ Grief is common to all, but unique to you. There is no “right” way to grieve, only your way.
¨ Death of a loved one offers an opportunity to consider one’s own mortality.
¨ Eventually, faithfulness to the deceased demands re-engagement with life.
¨ Getting over grief is impossible. . . getting through grief isn’t.
¨ Sometimes the best gift offered to one grieving is simply: “I’m willing to talk about anything, anytime.”
¨ Rituals create communities and offer comfort. Avoiding rituals robs us of needed companionship.
¨ Faith in God doesn’t lessen the pain of loss. It does, however, provide direction, meaning, and hope.
¨ Fellow grievers share a language which outsiders cannot understand.
¨ Those who try to talk you out of your grief are not evil—just insecure.
¨ Significant dates will always remain significant, and deserve to be honored in some way.
¨ Those who do not—or cannot—fully grieve are destined to unexpected bouts of anger, depression, and sadness further down the road.
¨ There is no fast forward button for getting through grief.
¨ Keeping it together emotionally for the sake of others exacts an exorbitant price on griever’s emotional well being.
¨ Being in grief is not being crazy. It just feels like it.

Virgil Fry