21st Century Christian Magazine

New Testament Chrisitanity in the Present Age

The Christian Bookshelf Review
By Mikee Delony

"Fire. One of the basic elements of earth.
Fire has a mysterious allure to humans . . .
It's flaming, dancing light taps into primal connection."
- VIRGIL FRY

Fire has served as a vital metaphor for thousands of years of humanity. Necessary for life, for light, for warmth, for food, fire blackens forests, devastes property, multilates flesh, and destroy's life. Fire can be contained or controlled, warming and lighting our lives but is often capricious and unpredictible, dangerous and destructive. Many of us who are overwhelmed with the busyness of too many responsibilities - work, church, family, community, illness - suffer burnout. Others have managed to rekindle their passion for spouse, family, interests, God.

In a companion to his highly acclaimed book for suffering families, Disrupted: Finding God in Illness and Loss, Virgil Fry's Rekindled: Warmed by the Fires of Hope uses the powerful metaphor of fire, both the devasting refinement of wildfire and the comforting light of a campfire or fireplace, to light our journey through grief or other forms of burnout toward the eternal, life-giving source of fire, our loving Father.

Fry, a longtime chaplain for MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston, Texas, and Executive Director of Lifeline Chaplaincy, has devoted his life to comforting the grieving and to mentoring and teaching others who desire to serve alongside him. He divides the book into three sections reflective of the phases of our journey through the difficult seasons of grief caused by illness, disappointment, disaster, and/or death. He reminds us that the fires ravaging many lives may not be immediately obvious to others and include private losses, disappointments, discouragements in addition to illness and death. In each section, Fry brings together short readings, poems, prayers, and meditations that reflect, comfort, and guide our movements through life's inevitable trials.

In the first section, "Warmed by the Fires of Hope: Sharing the Light, Drawing us Home," Fry reveals the first glimpse of his compassionate heart by writing and choosing readings that prepare the reader for life's unexpected "lightening strikes" of illness and disaster. In addition to reminding us of a need for a strong anchor in our compassionate Father, he recommends that we develop an active compassion for others, a listening ear, a sense of humor, as well as empathy and patience with and for grieving hearts.

In Section Two, "When Fires Rage: Creating Chaos, Leaving Despair," Fry brings us through the fires of destruction and pain, which leave "chaos" and "despair" in their wake. He reminds us that after being swept by a wildfire, we may begin again, but that our lives are forever changed. In this section, Fry provides wisdom and comfort for one who is grieving the loss caused by seen or unseen fires of life. He gently provides permission if not exhortation for those suffering loss to allow themselves the opportunity to grieve and to walk rather than rush through "seasons of distress." He advises following Biblical examples of lamentation, reminding us that grieving "takes time, and then some more time.'' In addition to suggestions and prayers for those moving through the dark aftermath of devastating fire, he provides Biblical precedence and approval for turning to God with our pain and confusion and using the words of one of his wife's third graders, "gitting an appointment to gripe" about our disappointments and grief.

Finally, in Section Three, "Fires of Home Rekindled: Rejoicing Again, Renewing Our Faith," Fry provides us with a glimmer of controlled, warm, welcoming firelight for those who have moved through the dark night of grief and are ready to begin life again. He reminds us that "it is not easy to begin anew." One of the most useful features of the book is found in this section. Fry draws from his extensive experience in crafting compassionate, thoughtful responses to those in crisis, words that provide solace and support rather than the traditional clichés such as "Everything happens for a purpose," or "I know lots of people who've dealt with that," phrases which offer little comfort to someone suffering a traumatic loss. He also provides examples of those who, as they begin to rebuild and move on, reframe the limitations or losses. A life touched and scarred by fire can be transformed anew, changed and reconstructed, but still valuable and productive. And finally, Fry reminds us of God's unfailing love and faithfulness for his children, the hope provided by the symbol of a comforting fire burning in the hearth of his heavenly home.

Virgil Fry's book provided some quiet, thoughtful moments for my overly busy life. It is, of course, a spiritual comfort for anyone suffering the destructive or even refining fires of life, but will also be appreciated by those enjoying the peace of quiet, controlled home fires, the quiet moments of calm between the firestorms of life.

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By Mikee Delony teaches English at Abilene Christian University where her specialty is medieval literature and mythology. Her undergraduate degree is from the University of Houston where she is also finishing her PhD.

virgil fry